How to Survive a Long-Distance Breakup

I felt like this was a very appropriate topic for Singles Awareness Day.

Here is a survival guide should you ever be on either end of a long-distance breakup.

Relationships are hard, we know that, and differences in space and time really put a strain on any couple. Needless to say, some do not survive. If you are ever on the unfortunate losing end of that situation, here is a helpful list of things to do:

1) Never let them see you cry.

--Sound tough? It is. Every second of every day, you want to burst into tears. DON'T DO IT. Public stoicism is the best answer in this scenario. It is hard to bond with new friends when your face looks like a red, swelled-up punchingbag, and spontaneous tears need explanations for all of those around you, and the last thing you want to do is figure out how to tell your host family in French that your boyfriend broke up with you. That being said, step 2 is a must.

2) Set aside private time to grieve.

--This step is VERY important. It hurts, and you can't hold all of that inside of you, especially when it feels like this:

It's not healthy. Make time to let all the anguish out. A good bit of wallowing must occur before any process of recovery can be made.

3) Comfort object

--Having a comfort object greatly aids in the process of recovery. Something preferably cuddly and nonjudgmental is best. The comfort object is there to aid you in maintaining public stoicism, and also to help you release in private times of grieving. This was my comfort object:

His name is Poupousse, and he has magic healing powers. He can tell exactly when my stoicism is about to crack or when I just need a hug, and curls up in my lap and refuses to move until I do. Blankets, stuffed animals, cats, and lap dogs all make good comfort objects. If none of these things appeal to you as a comfort object, you are on your own. Computers and websites will not work as comfort objects because avoidance doesn't solve the problem, it just shelves all the angry emotions away until it overflows into a mess of despair. The mindvice can only crush so much.

4) Choose music selection very carefully

--Happy songs or angry songs are prefered, never songs that will make you weep unless it is in your private grieving time. Damien Rice, Feist, Bon Iver, Iron and Wine, and any other lovely love artists are to be avoided. Stick with things more robust or upbeat, like Ra Ra Riot, Passion Pit, Andrew Bird, and some selections of Sufjan Stevens. Pick and choose carefully what you want to listen to, especially when meandering down the streets of France.

5) Remember to breathe and still live life to the fullest every day

--This last step is crucial. Long-distance breakups provide a great opportunity for a clean break. Said ex does not haunt the same places you do, and communication being cut off becomes much easier. Whether abroad or at home when being broken up with in a long distance way, life is still around you and it is beautiful, so sally forth and indulge in some chocolate crêpes for once. You deserve it.

Now that the survival guide is finished, some multi-cultural notes on Valentine's Day.

It's much less of a big deal over here, which makes it much less gimmecky. I have seen no advertisements clouded in hearts and obtrusive naked cherubs. Not even a billboard. The only sign that it was still going on over here was the front page of the Angers newspaper, which had a lovely picture of an engaged couple underneath a heart sculpture. That's about it. Oh, and facebook, but that's unavoidable. Found Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (in French, of course, but I must keep the tradition alive). Anyways, happier post tomorrow, I promise.